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Sunday, May 29th, 2005
4:32 pm

7 Gary Oldman/Sirius B/W icons.

Credit teh_steph  or _teh_steph_, and no hotlinking!

Teaser :

(livin' la vida loca)

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Sunday, December 26th, 2004
9:47 pm

While I was shopping at Best Buy looking for DVD racks, the associate who was helping me saw the copy of Hero in my hand and we got to talking about Asian Cinema, Quentin Tarrentino and how much we love them both. He told me of an exclusive screening for The House of Flying Daggers that was showing that night and that I must go. I immedietely called Chris and we made a plan from there.

The following is a short, modified "teaser" synopis of the movie from the Press Kit that my boyfriend gave me:

It is 859AD, and the Tang Dynasty, one of the most enlightned empires in Chinese history, is in decline. The Emperor is icompetent and the govenment is corrupt. Unrest is spreading througout the land, and many rebel armies are forming in protest. The larges, and most prestigious, is an underground alliance called the House of Flying Daggers.

The House of Flying Daggers operates mysteriously, stealing from the rich to give to the poor. Thus, they have earned the support and admiration of the people and expanded quickly. Based in Feng Tian County, close to the Imperial Capital, the House of Flying Daggers has long been a thorn in the side ofthe local deputies, their bitter enimes.

Captain Leo (ANDY LAU TAK WAH) has heard that one of the new dancers at the Peony Pavillion, a local brothel, is a member of the House of Flying Daggers. So, he sends Captain Jin (TAKESHI KANESHIRO) to the Pavillion undercover, to search her out. When the Madam presents Jin with Mei (ZIYI ZHANG), the beautiful new dancer, he is suprised to lean that she is blind.

When Mei dances for Jin, he realizes that she is a member of the House of Flying Daggers, and tries to attack her by ripping her clothes off. Leo then charges in, threatening to arrest both Jim and Mei for their indecent behavior. The Madam convinces Leo to have Mei dance for him first before making any decision and Mei performs an elaborate dance called The Echo Game. Mei once again reveals herself to be a member of the House of Flying Daggers and challenges Leo with his own sword. Despite her lack of sight, she is an impressive fighter, but Leo prevails and arrests Mei.

It was a great movie. I loved Hero when I saw it, and House of Flying Daggers has many of the same actors, but this movie blew Hero out of the water. Especially the Bamboo Forest Fight scene.

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Thursday, November 25th, 2004
10:48 pm - Alexander

Wow. Colin Ferell is so hot.

Other than that, the movie was very long and very GAY. Literally. There were page boys being raped, men making out, and various hints of homosexuality thrown in almost everywhere. I am sure some guys will think the movie is super sexy IF they like humping other guys.

Oh, and eyeliner. I haven't seen that much eyeliner on men since '96 at a Marilyn Manson concert. Despite the fact I go to goth clubs, I think men that wear smudgy black eyeliner are so not hot. Ugh. Tacky.

About 2 hours into the movie, the men have fought battle after battle and have decreased in numbers because of it. They wanted to go home. I started wondering if this point in the movie was planned to coincide with how desperate I was for the movie to end. I found myself thinking, PLEASE LET THE MEN GO HOME. But no. The movie lasted another hour. Tears. Frustration. Numb ass.

Angelina Jolie was well cast and very hot as always. I loved her hair.

In all, the movie was very good, but too long and drawn out. There was too much emphasis put on his sexuality, and the battle scenes. I wouldn't pay to see it in the theater, although the epic blockbusters usually look best there. Save it til video and stop it 1/2 way in to eat a meal and do laundry. It's that kind of movie.

Happy Thanksgiving!

current mood: full

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Thursday, August 30th, 2001
2:52 pm - Napoleon Dynamite

Synopsis: This hick boy who has a red afro and wears moonboots (HA!) lives with his wacky, butch grandma, and his "too old to still be at home" computer geek brother. He meets this boy and this girl and they become friends. The boy, Pedro, decides to run for class president against the most popular blonde girl in school. Funny antics.

Review: The movie was for lack of a better word, CORNY. But, it had that cult-like, indie feel that I just love. I laughed a lot, but I also snickered. In all, if you don't expect too much, you won't be let down. 3.5/5 stars.

Oh yeah. Listening to Napoleon scheme to "pick up babes" is worth it, but you could rent it and have the same effect, especially since it is only playing at like...3 theaters.

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Friday, July 30th, 2004
3:11 am - the village

i guess it was alrite...
well...thats what i kept telling myself the whole carride home...
but as hard as i tried i just cant lie to myself like that...
the acting and cinematography was excellent...
if only the movie would have followed the trend...
rock on ian for calling it...
i dunno...but seeing the batman trailor on the big screen was definitel worth it...
i guess you should go see it anyway...

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Tuesday, July 6th, 2004
12:12 am - Really Quick

Spiderman 2--loved it. Felt a little let down and manipulated w/the jesus pose in the subway and the wedding scene at the end. Wow. Great movie.


Triplets of Belleville--When I figure out what I just watched I'll let you know. Cool movie, though.

Rush Hour--Can you understand the words that are comin' out of my mouth?

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Sunday, June 27th, 2004
10:34 pm - Farenheight 911

Before I begin this, I will split my review into personal beliefs as they relate to seeing the movie, and actual movie review.

Michael Moore, known for interviews, political commentary, and "Bowling for Columbine," has done it again. He is fantastic at editing. This time, he goes on a personal tirade about the president, showing his family's ties to Saudi Arabian money, and general poor handling of terrorism. Moore shows us the facts about the aftermath of 9/11, but does NOT capitalize on the footage of the towers. He does use sound effects combined with a blank screen though, which is perhaps more moving. I liked his use of songs throught the movie. The Bush's smiling to REM's "Shiny Happy People," arm in arm with Saudis, really struck home. He succeeded in making Bush look like a total BOOB, but didn't always state the facts... he also played on emotions of the audience with a before and after interview with a US mother of a slaughtered soldier. She was pro war before and after seeing the aftermath was very against it. It was poignant. I teared up, but I could see that it was meant to make me feel that way. In total 4/5 stars.

I had no idea how much money the Saudis have invested in America. We're talking almost a trillion dollars. Moore totally exposed Bush's military history and informed viewers that one of the names Bush crossed out on his military history report was that of this dude who is tied in with managing Saudi money in the US. It was frightening to realize how wrong the war in Iraq is, and how we're fighting the wrong people all for OIL in the name of freedom. Saudi Arabia and Afganistan are the enemy that will seemingly never be touched because of money. Well at least during HIS presidency. Grr.

In Sum: PLEASE VOTE THIS NOVEMBER, and do yourself a favor and see this movie whether you are for Bush or against him.

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Monday, June 14th, 2004
2:08 pm - my weekend of movies

it all started on wednesday with pitch black...
this movie was awesome...and for once vin diesel was actually good...i always avoided it just writing it off as a scifi movie...but with riddick coming out and duvon bullying me to see it i figured id give it a chance...and im happy i did...it wasnt a scifi movie as much as it was a thriller type suspense movie...it was good...and vinnys character was really cool...i think its a should see...

then comes thursday nite movies...stepford wives...
oy vey...this movie had so much potential...but apparently that potential was suck potential...it was bad...very bad...the most exciting part of the movie was seeing the film burn on screen due to some sort of error...well im sure ian didnt think that was exciting...but i never actually saw that before...but yeah...movie was boring...not funny...and just didnt even keep my attention...so if you dont feel the burning desire to see it...then i would advise not...unless you get in for free and like christopher walken...he was good...but then again...he is christopher walken...so hes just about always good...

finally friday night at the regal...the chronicles of riddick...
seeing as how i saw pitch black just so i could see this movie i had some expectations for it...and needless to say those expectations were blown away...this movie was awesome...exciting...funny...good CG...awesome, awesome ending...and vinny was pretty good...i dont know if i was just letting the normal vin deisel movie slide and saying i liked this one just cause i liked the character or not...but it was still really good...and making a day of pitch black and chronicles of riddick would be an awesome day...

welp...thats all for now...

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Sunday, June 13th, 2004
12:28 pm - CW

For those of us in NJ there was a huge article/interview with Christopher Walken in The Star Ledger. I ripped the two pages out. I'll let Doug read it later.

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Thursday, May 27th, 2004
6:29 pm - Broken Lizard

Supertroopers (1am Tuesday & 7ish last night)

Synopsis: Caper comedy about a small state trooper barrack struggles to stay in operation in VT. The troopers are laid back, wise-asses with lots of quirks. When a woman is found murdered and is tied to a drug smuggling ring they hope that by solving the murder and showing up the local police the governor will put them back in business.

Review: Current favorite movie. A+

Club Dread (9ish last night)

Synopsis: Campy horror movie about a private island resort with one slight problem: Someone is killing off the employees.

Review: TG I watched this after Russ and Ian explained it wasn't anything like Supertroopers. I still enjoyed it for what it was. B.

The larger distributors don't have a street date listed for Puddle Cruiser at work yet. ??

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Tuesday, May 25th, 2004
9:48 pm - The Devil's Playground

Synopsis: Award-winning documentary about Amish (don't snore too obviously) teenagers. Apparently, when Amish children reach the age of sixteen they go through a mandatory period of time ranging from a few months to a few years where they do not live according to Amish culture, but rather like the English (us). At the end of this period they decide to join the Amish church or leave it for good. If they choose the latter option they are shunned and never spoken to again. Never a problem before, now the teens have jobs (working in Amish "factories" and paychecks to provide them with cars, apartments/trailers, etc. There is a HUGE drug problem (speed) with these people. They wear English clothes, drive cars, smoke, do drugs, have Amish raves (I swear) w/up to 1500 young adults.
Review: I love eye-opening experiences. Very interesting, very good. My only complaint was that it only went into full detail with a few of the teenagers that it followed around. This is probably because a lot of them refuse to be photographed. B+

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Friday, May 21st, 2004
4:25 pm - Revolutions

If you want your Matrix Revolutions experience to be less horrible than you remember the first time being:

Watch it within close approximation (48 hours is pushing it) after watching Reloaded.

Then it seems less of a crappy movie and more like a 2 hour conclusion. I wasn't prepared for a 2 hour edgeofyourseat stressfest.

Review: When Reloaded and Revolutions are viewed together as one movie it gets an A.

Things I hate about this movie:
1. Keannu Reeves and Trinity.
I just kept wishing she would die faster and really didn't care. These two are one of the worst screen couples I've ever had the displeasure of seeing. On the other hand, Zhee and Link (sp?) were 80 times more believeable and I was much better equipped toidentify with their feelings and emotions.

I really got tired of the whole, "Trinity, I need to tell you something serious now." Hug. Kiss. pattern.

2. The filmmakers think that we're such morons (I'm assuming) that we couldn't get the whole Neo/Jesus connection with their wonderful and subtle nudging. No. They had to have a flurescent orange cross radiate from his body when he sacrificed himself. As if his spread arms (think crucifixion) wasn't enough. I really don't care what their motivation for that was, it was really a wrong move.

Things I enjoyed:
1. The Oracle's take on The Architect.

2. How the trilogy ended. If he didn't die I'd be disappointed. If the humans "won" I'd be disappointed. Etc.

3. I loved the entire scene with the machine family and Neo in the way station waiting for the Train Man. The asian man (I forgot his character's name) was dead on. He was perfect. I loved seeing them in a more human light. It reminded me of one of the shorts from The Animatrix.

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Tuesday, May 18th, 2004
10:44 pm - Matrixes

The Matrix
Synopsis: A malcontent computer programmer (Keannue Reeves) is shown the true nature of reality. After a war with machines, humanity has been either enslaved to provide resources or driven underground to a banal existence. An elite group of hackers (appropriate nomenclature?) enlists him to fight in the war and help free mankind because they believe it has been prophesied that he will succeed.

Review: A+ (Entertainment Weekly Style, thanks Russ!). I don't think I can do this justice so I won't try. It isn't too hard to imagine that everyone who reads this is on the same page anyway. When I work at the circ desk and someone rents this DVD I always ask if they've seen it before, how they liked it, etc. (unless they're a "problem patron" in which case I just shut up and shove the movie over). Only once when a patron returned it did they remark that they didn't see what was so great about it.

The Matrix Reloaded
Synopsis: Neo has accepted his role as The One, but he still wears the label slightly awkwardly. The Oracle finally sends for Neo and thus starts the next leg of his quest. In this second movie, we are introduced to rogue programs with their own agendas, The Architect of the matrix itself, and a fabulous rav...heh. Nevermind. An interesting subplot develops: Agent Smith is one of these Rogue programs who has chosen exile instead of deletion. He has learned how to replicate himself and fixates on Neo.

Review: A. The first movie was tight and streamlined. This was less so, but it is not (as I first thought) a detraction. It told a story and little detail and backstory were revealed. Reloaded delivers these and I am grateful for it. The Matrix is explained in greater detail. How it works, how it was started, its complexity and its vastness. The agents and other programs are fleshed out more, and The Oracle's role and nature are explained.
The script was very well written. I refuse to nitpick about it.
The effects were, as expected, fabulous, with a chase scene that will wait to be rivaled for a long time. The supporting characters were really well thought out (Merovingian/The Twins/etc.) and have a lot of potential for further stories/movies/comics.
The + is missing because CAM and KR have zero chemistry. Neo kisses her in the elevator and it seems as though he'd rather have a slug in his mouth than her tongue. Their dialogue is rote and wooden. This could be for a quite obvious reason, but I refuse to speculate.

Coming Soon:

Oh, and I just saw the trailer for Catwoman on MTV during Jackass and wow. I don't even know if I want to watch it. I suppose I do, but on a very apprehensive basis.

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Monday, May 10th, 2004
8:51 am - Movie Night

I know it's a little off topic but I figured some of you might be interested...For all those in the SF Bay Area this Thursday at the Parkway Theater (that's right sofas, pizza, and beer)...

Ultra rare Mexican/Chilean B movie horror!
$6, 9:15

We dare you to see CURSE OF THE STONE HAND (1964), two obscure Chilean horror movies re-edited by the notorious Jerry Warren into one obscure surreal smorgasbord of spooky silliness, sneaking in "new" footage of a tired John Carradine amid a "plot" about a murderous creeping hand! Pure insanity, like nothing you've ever witnessed on a movie screen anywhere, anytime!
Admission: $6

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Friday, April 30th, 2004
2:57 am - atleast this time i didnt have to apologize

so we saw envy tonite...all i have to say is im envious of ian...cause he wasnt there...holy jeez this movie was horrible...not even jack black could save that garbage...
slow...boring...not funny...and come on...even anthony didnt like it...but like the title says...i didnt convince people to see it...so i dont have to apoligize for it...
but yeah...dont even waste your time...even if your a jack black fan...just dont...
awful awful movie...
i cant even think of more ways to say it...
bad bad bad...

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Friday, April 23rd, 2004
3:10 am - THE PUNISHMENT!!!

im sorry doug...but your lucky im a good brother...because if i wasnt...i would wake you up...smack you in the face...and say WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING!!!!

the punisher...or the punishment...as ive grown to call it...was one of THE worst movies just about ever made...horrible acting...horrible diologue...horrible characters...horrible adaptation of character...

even if you know nothing of the punisher you would picture by the name that if you pissed him off without a seconds thought you would have a face full of shotgun bullet...but no...this movie there bombs...bows and arrows...and psychological foolery...though for any other person that would be fine...but thats not the frank castle i know...

and im sure some one out there was thinking well you thought it was gunna be bad so you went in there expecting it to be bad...not true...actually before i saw it i had only heard one bad opinion on the movie...and i would just like to take this moment to apologize...ori...ill never do you rong again...

and for the nonstop action and entertainment that doug was telling me about...i just have nothing to say to that...cause...well...yeah there was none of that...so so so bad...i found myself longing to see dolph lundgren on the screen...and you know its bad when you want him back...

do i recommend this movie? if you have to pay for it...no...if you get in free...and you like comics...why the hell not...its free...just dont go and think its gunna be a good movie...cause its not...

the end

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Saturday, April 17th, 2004
10:45 am - the punisher

the origin is different. i saw it last night. they took quite a few liberties. but. i thoroughly enjoyed it. should a punisher movie be funny? probably not. but it was. and it was good. the action was almost nonstop. i had a good time watching it. so there were a few lines of horrible comicbook movie dialogue. no ones perfect. i rank this over spiderman. but under x2.

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Saturday, April 10th, 2004
12:49 am

I watched this last night while Doug slept. If there's nothing else on I will usually watch this. For some inexplicable reason I'm drawn to Showgirls. I think it's EB's shininess. Her makeup glitters, she wears glittery body lotion, her clothes are shiny. I like sparkly. And boobs. Lots of boobs.
Elizabeth Berkley plays a naive dancer who hitchhikes to Vegas on a wish and a dream only to end up stripping at The Cheetah. She attracts the lascivious attention of a local showgirl celebrity starring in Goddess (Gena Gershon. My favorite! Unparalleled!) at The Stardust. Said showgirl get's Nomi (EB) an audition and lo and behold Nomi is in the chorus line. Drama ensues. Lots of dancing and pretty costumes.
There's this one scene where EB is giving a lap dance to GG's boytoy and she strips nude. All you can think of is sweaty, squishy, warm vagina. It's just thrust right in your face. Too bad it was made before HDTV.
Make up your own mind.

Jason X
I watched this last night while Doug slept after Showgirls. I'd rather have watched Jason Goes To Hell, but whatever.
In the future a grop of scientists discovers Jason Voorhess' body suspended cryogenically and being the idiots that inevitably occupy the cast list of slasher flicks, defrost the killer popsicle and neglect to take away his machete. Along the way he is accidentally exposed to nanotechnology which makes him a SuperJason. One memorable scene has him fighting a robot formed to impersonate a cute human girl. She loses.
Don't watch this unless you're me.

Enemy of the State
Doug made me watch this tonight instead of Scream. It didn't suck.
Will Smith plays an innocent lawyer pulled into intrigue by a chance encounter. Federal Agents pursue him using national security surveillance equipment. Gene Hackman. Jon Voight (sp?). Jack Black. Jamie Kennedy. My ADD interfered with my attention span. Or the movie just wasn't good enough. Either way...
I didn't like it, but you probably will.

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Sunday, April 4th, 2004
4:20 pm - Sushi

Synopsis: Incompetent Nazis engaged in a supernatural ritual are interrupted by allied forces who then adopts a side effect of the ritual: a chibi demon. Flash forward about 60 some odd years and the imp has grown into a huge red demon named Hellboy who along with some other freaks and weirdos fight monsters for the FBI. A nazi babe resurrects her lover, Rasputin, and plan on bringing about Armageddon by completing the first ritual.

This was a pretty funny movie. I was expecting it to be worse than it was. There was one particularly side splitting scene that takes place on a rooftop with Hellboy, a small human child, and pigeons.

My one (huge) complaint: The evil monsters that were conjured up by Rasputin and his girlfriend shared too much DNA with Octopi (yes, I know that is the wrong plural word). Not even a scary octopus. Just the gross kind you see in supermarkets and in Japanese restaurants. Bleh. Couldn't get worked up about that. It reminded me of the scene in Ghostbusters where Ray summons the Marshmallow man to bring about mankind's doom.

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1:26 am - chainsaw

texas chainsaw massacre. the remake.
eh. whatever.

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